I No Longer Have Hands

Case and point, it's taken me nearly a month to write this and my last post.

I have come to realize, and accept, that I no longer have hands. Between two babies, pandemic life, working full time and all of the other things that aren't worth listing, yet seem to fill in all of the gaps, I have maybe five minutes of spare time a day. Usually spent scrolling stories of an otherwise untouched Instagram account, or trying to bring myself up to speed with current events via Twitter and LinkedIn.

Inktober just came and went, two weeks ago now, and every day during the month of October, I brought my sketchbook with me to every room in my house, from home to work and back again, to doctor's appointments and to curbside grocery pick-ups. I flipped through it a couple of times, reminiscing about how much I've improved over the years and how much I miss making art. I even asked for reference photo submissions again, hoping that the pressure of drawing someone else's pet would make me make time. It did not. I still plan on drawing them, but good grief I don't know when.

Likewise, I've carried my laptop with me from room to room, planning on finishing these last two posts. I had Photoshopped Family mostly planned out, but only a title for this one. I also knew I want to incorporate Venus de Milo into the image (which I created myself). I struck the jackpot tonight with caffeine powered drive and two sleepy babies. My husband did made dinner and did the dishes, for which I'm very thankful, allowing me to finally sit down and type. It feels good. Not as good as pencil to paper would, but I'll take it.

But I did manage to make some progress elsewhere. I listened to Unfu*k Yourself again, several times in fact. I've been able to keep up with The Great British Bake Off, and the new season of The Mandalorian.

The election happened, and thank goodness is over. With Thanksgiving looming, I'm attempting to plan as much as I can for Christmas now, knowing it will take the extra couple of weeks to get anything done.

This was more of a vent/rant, stream of consciousness than a narrative of sorts. All in all, juggling is hard, especially when your hands are tied. Thanks for reading.

Photoshopped Family

I happen to have professional level photo retouching skills. It started back while I was studying for my animation degree. I had to take an beginner level Photoshop class, where we learned the basics of color correction and retouching, and I was hooked. I've had to tweak so many photos for my job, ranging from erasing trash on the ground to switching peoples' faces from one photo to another.

I've come to realize that many of our family photos will be composited images, sewn together scraps of different pictures, forming a memory greater than the sum of its parts.

Squirmy babies make for blurry photos. Twins make for mismatched facial expressions. I've already had to create some 'Frankenstein' photos, that otherwise seem like lucky shots where everyone is smiling at the camera.

The trick is matching the lighting, and not going overboard with the retouching. I'll brighten the colors, deepen the shadows, switch the odd body part or two and blend it all together. The best part is knowing we have decent photos to share with family and friends.

One day I hope to get more creative with our photos though. Once the girls are bigger and can voice their opinions, I'll let them choose what special effects they want me to include.

A long time ago, maybe ten years ago already, I happened upon a photographer who took photos of their kids laying flat on the floor and built different imaginary scenes around them using fabric and other props. I could not find the specific photos I was thinking of, but the photo to the left demonstrates the style I'm thinking of.

I found another photographer who photoshops his daughter into dangerous situations, while looking for the previously mentioned style. I don't think this is a particular theme I would pursue, but the idea is neat. It wouldn't be difficult either. I'm sure there are ways for me to utilize this "photoshop the adult out of the image" style, I'm eager to brainstorm the possible stories I could tell using this technique.

Additionally this superhero in pajamas photo is great as well. I'm can imagine creating Starfire and Raven or Supergirl and Batgirl duo photos.

All three reference images are links to articles with galleries of additional works. I highly recommend checking them out, they're all very inspirational. While I'm trying to cherish these babies as they are, a part of me is very much looking forward to playing with them and creatively collaborating on what kind of art we can make together, including unusual and imaginative family photos.

And I Just Paid Off my Mastercard

I've had a love/hate relationship with credit cards, more than my adult life. My Gold AMEX reads that I've been a customer since 1996, I was ten in 1996. At the ripe age of 16, my parents got an additional card to their account with my name on it. I never did anything outlandish, in fact I was quite the cautionary spender. I understood that it wasn't infinite money coming from a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. And I understood that my parents had to pay their balance at the end of every month, including whatever I had charged. I think I really just used it for gas and food, and as I got a little older, utilities in college when I needed the help.

Well, when I graduated from college, maybe even before that, my parents had me sever my account from theirs, which still left me with the "cardholder since 1996" status. In the many years since then, I've also held quite a few other cards. I had a blue AMEX card back in my college days (I think that is what ultimately sparked the separation from my parents account "If you have your own account, why do you need ours?" type of mentality). I've had store specific cards, for Victoria Secret (still do), Neiman Marcus (I used it once for a $400 Moschino x Powerpuff Girls sweater [worn it once]); and it doesn't stop at credit cards, I have business checking and savings accounts, two buisness credit cards, and then there's my new Acorns Spend debit card.

I didn't intend this to be a tell all of my financial history, but it feels like you need to know the details to understand the importance of where this is going.

I graduated from college in 2008, during what is considered the worst downturn in recent history. Gas prices were near if not at $5/gallon, jobs were scarce, and I was told basically to pay my own way as a recent college grad. I was sleeping on my parents' couch, as they had downsized while I was away and I no longer had a bedroom. It took me 6 months post graduation to find a job. I had zero income. I lived off of my aforementioned AMEX gold card. I probably racked up a couple thousand in debt, between gas (again $5/gallon), lunch with friends, and just existing... But then I got a job, and I needed a new wardrobe, and had to commute 90 miles a day (45 miles each way), plus I was spending money as though I had it because I grossly underestimated how long it would take me to earn what I needed to pay off my ever-growing debts.

I don't remember the exact details, but I think reality kicked in once I hit about $10,000... The cherry on top irony, my first job was as an estimator.

Yes. $10,000. On clothes, food, gas. Nothing really splurge worthy, no brand new cell phone, no bad ass computer, no super fashionable luxury purses, etc. I shopped at Marshall's for my clothes, discounted but nice brands. I bought much of my food from the grocery store. Just living, I racked up $10K in less than a year.

Again, this tell-all wasn't the intent when I wrote the title, so I'm going to go at a little bit of a quicker pace now. ⏱

For those of you on the edge of your seat, I paid off the $10,000 and stopped using my gold card nearly entirely. What I did to pay it off is perhaps the most "early 20's girl consumer trying to pay off debt" thing I could have done. Any time I wanted to make an online purchase, I would get all the way to checkout, including choosing a shipping method, and I would pay that exact amount to my AMEX balance. I felt like I was spending money (the root problem) and in a way I was, but I wasn't bringing more crap I didn't need into my home.

I think I paid it off in less than two years. I honestly don't remember, because that was only round one with my gold card...

Fast forward a few years, to 2013 to be precise. I started going back to school at nights, to get a second Bachelor's degree in a totally new subject. I started paying my tuition with my trusty gold card. I racked up $23,000 in debt over the next three years. It wasn't just tuition, because I was using the card regularly again, I got comfortable using it to pay for other things. Specifically, my dog got really sick and ultimately passed away, about $6,000 of her medical bills went to that gold card (now may be a good time to mention it HAS NO LIMIT, which is EVIL). I also got comfortable assuming I would get bonuses and other added jolts to my income, convinced that I could keep my head above water while waiting on these extras, that ultimately were few and far between. It wasn't as outlandish as it sounds, I got quite a bit of financial recognition my first year at the job I was working at the time, however, that waned when the economy took a hit in 2015 . I also graduated with $39,000 in student loan debt, you do that math... BFAs are freaking expensive. A final stab on the way out, I apparently owed the school $5,000 outside of loans, this is where my Ulta Mastercard came into existence.

I had considered getting the Ulta Mastercard for a while, but really didn't want yet another opportunity for more debt. However, I needed to pay off what I owed the school. I made the decision and I opened the card with the sole intent of using it to handle my school debt and then being done with it. Well, for the most part I did this correctly. I put my remaining balance on the Mastercard, and then paid it off as quickly as I could, I think I did it in about 6 months. The points I earned from it were awesome, I basically got hundreds of dollars of credit for instore purchases. Great for Christmas gifting, and myself.

But this is all the beginning of the story. In all of this, my Mastercard kept getting additional credit limits due to my excellent spending/paying off pattern. As it sits now, the limit is $8,000. Absolutely evil. I'm not sure how I got it back up again, but I did, and this time not from a super disciplined, use it for a specific purpose and pay it off immediately mentality, but from poor habits and "I'll just pay it off later" laziness. At the beginning of this year, my balance was over $4,000, from crap I can't even name.

And today, I paid it off. I made my FINAL PAYMENT of $500.17. And it feels good.

And just because you're likely wondering, my gold card is down to $7,000 (which is still horrendous), but using the Dave Ramsey snowball method, I should be able to get it down even quicker now that the Mastercard is done. And if you're extra interested, the federal student debt is down to $23,000.

Phew, if you stuck around until the end, thank you, I hope this helps in some way.

If you have any questions or comments, feel free to inquire below!